Do equal rights revoke the need for thoughtful conduct of ladies and gentlemen towards each other?
Today its International Men’s Day. Men are men. Men will be men. Have you heard women say that often? Surely, because most guys have certain habits that are simply unalterable. Does that mean that men are habitual flirts who cannot take their eyes off a woman? It doesn’t. Do we need to change that? Sharing my experiences from navy.
The first thing taught to us was about extending courtesies to a lady, when I joined Naval Academy in 1970 as officer Cadet. Today women fly fighter planes, serve as police officers, drive race cars, ride Harleys, CEOs and rule countries. In short women can do every job that men do. Is there any reason for men to continue to open doors for them, offer them seats in public places and offer to carry their heavy packages?
In a word, YES. Common courtesy towards another human being shows a regard for the other person’s comfort and safety. And no men should be surprised if a woman returns at least a few of those same courtesies when the situation calls for it. When you practice these rules of courtesy, you are making a gesture of respect.
Equal rights didn’t revoke the need for thoughtful conduct of ladies and gentlemen towards each other. If for no other reason, common courtesies help ease the strains of everyday life. When it is understood that a gentleman holds open a door and the lady go in first, lady to accept graciously. If you’re still a little fuzzy as to what is proper behaviour around the opposite sex, the following extracts from my old notes are for you… my brothers… on this International Men’s Day – 2017.
Just in case you aren’t familiar with these demonstrations of gentlemanly courtesy, please make the following rules a part of your routine behaviour:
- When walking along the city streets with a lady, walk closer to the street to keep her being splashed from vehicles. If in unsafe area walk on the building side to prevent her being mugged.
- Take off your hat or cap when indoors in company of a lady.
- In a restaurant, you lead the way if you’re the host. If the lady is the host, she leads.
- After parking a car, walk around and open the door for your female companion.
- Rise when a lady enters or leaves a room.
- Hold a lady’s chair and help to seat her. If someone is doing this, stand until she’s seated.
- Sudden silence when a woman approaches a group of men is rudeness. The lesson is to keep your all public conversations suitable for a mixed crowd. It you are telling a group of men a joke or story that you wouldn’t be comfortable sharing with a woman, it’s better not to tell it.
Needless to mention, that a woman of good manners knows how to carry gracefully. That includes knowing how to accept common courtesies graciously by men… Behanji… ‘Thank you to banta hei’ – though it may sound a bit outdated or behind the times.